Hats

As moms, we wear many different hats.  In order to keep our heads attached and our families fed (whether home-cooked or take-out) we have to multi-task and be prepared for multiple interuptions.  If the only thing I had to do all day is wear one hat, it would be easy (or atleast I dream it would be), but that is not reality.  So what do you do when yo have 5 hats on, someone wants to hand you 2 more, while 3 other people are pulling at you, threatening to throw you off balance and send all the hats flying in different directions?  Not sure, but taking a deep breath sometimes helps.  Then maybe you have to take the hats off for a moment and restack them so they're a bit more stable.  It may mean some go in a closet or the hat rack nearby for you to exchange later.  But one thing's for sure, it can't keep going on the way is or heads, not hats, will roll!

The Eagle

On my way to the gym this morning, I looked up and saw an eagle flying overhead.  It flew across the road and I lost sight of it as it flew over my car.  It seemed to follow along above me for awhile before heading off to do what it was going to do.

For me it was a real comforting sign from God that all will be okay.

I have an amazing daughter, but she is a normal 16 year old and as much as I love her, I still want to shake her sometimes.  Those times when you just do not know the best way to handle a situation, you think you have made the right decision, but it does not seem to work out the way you thought it would, it is nice to get a sign, some kind of assurance that it will all work out.  Perhaps I have done something right and haven't totally messed my kids up.

With all that is going on,  I was talking to my husband the other night and I said I would rather raise an eagle than a chicken.  (There is a history behind that comment that I won't go into now.)

So even though there are days when I look forward to it and days when I don't want it happen, it's going to be beautiful to watch her fly.

History

It occured to me the other day that I never explained the title to my blog.  I have told people for years that one day I would write a book and the title would be "Help!  I'm Super Mom and I'm Tangled up in My Cape!" 
I can always remember wanting to be a mom and wanting to stay home with them.  Then I got what I wished for!  With 3 kids, a husband, multiple animals of many shapes and sizes over the years, and frequently an exchange student in the house, I am pulled in many directions.  Not to mention volunteering at school, as every good "stay-at-home" mom should do, being involved in Jaycees (a community service organization for younger people), helping at church, having an at home business with Mary Kay, exercising, and more.  With my perfectionist personality, I feel I should be able to "do it all" and do it well.  The image of Super Mom, looking great in her size 6 (we won't even go lower than that!) spandex, flawless skin, flowing hair, hands on hips with a confident smile, easily tackling the most complicated of schedules and skillfully dousing any fires that may pop up, all while keeping the house and yard beautiful and a hot, healthy meal on the table, sounded pretty good to me.
Then I wake up and reality hits!  As I stumble out of bed, later than I should, my cape is not flowing behind me, I'm tripping on it or waving my arms around, trying to get it out of my face. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy being a mom and I love my kids, all of them, foreign and domestic.  I just don't like feeling frazzled, overwhelmed and scatter-brained most of the time.  No where in Proverbs 31 does it say the woman has a melt down because the kids are late to bed again, no one took the picnic basket out of the van 2 days ago with the chicken salad in it, the van won't start, the puppy piddled on the floor again and dear hubby came home late again because of a church meeting.  Somehow, Super Mom should be able to navigate such troubled waters with ease and a Coppertone tan to boot!
Hence my tangled up Super Mom image was born.  So hopefully my ramblings and insights may encourage or inspire someone else as they journey through life, tangled up or otherwise.

Weeds

I have been spending quite a bit of time outside lately working in the yard.  The weather is nice and I just don't want to be inside, despite all that needs to get done there, too.  But, that's for another day.
One of the things I've been spending the most time on is weeding.  Ever notice that it's never done?  I can get a flower bed all weeded and looking great and then just a few days later, those pesky things are back!  I got to thinking about how weeds are like bad habits and thoughts.  Some of my flower beds are very simple and if there is a weed, it is easy to spot and grab.  The flower beds around the pool have a ground cover vine that I want and some other flowers, but I don't want to clover and grass.  These flower beds are much more tedious to weed.  Sometimes I feel I need tweezers.  The grass and clover grow amongst the vine so I have to be very careful.  I can't just whack at them with a big hoe or my 3-prong claw, cause I'll lose some vine as well.
I have all sorts of bad habits and less than desirable thought that pop up in my head at any given time.  Some of them are pretty obvious and easy to catch and only a minor nuisance.  Others are like that insidious grass that has deep roots and sends runners everywhere.  Even when it looks like I got it all, it creeps back sooner than I'd like.  Just like some of my thoughts.  I think I've weeded it out, replaced it with truth (the negative tapes that play in my head about never being good enough are lies after all.  They just happen to be believable lies and paralyzing at times.), and then something happens and it starts playing all over again.  So I have to get the gloves out again and start weeding all over again.
Fortunately, when you look at some of the flower beds from a distance, they look great.  It's only when you get up close that you notice the weeds.  I pray that I can look good and be a positive influence on those around be despite some of the weeds in my life.  Meanwhile I'll just keep weeding away as best I can.

Be still

I am frequently reading devotions, books, articles, etc. and will often be inspired by the stories of lessons learned in the everyday events of life.  One day I remember thinking "I wish I could have a story like that."  You know when you have a pity party for yourself when everyone else seems to have inspired wisdom from a flower and all you can think is "what color was that?"  Or half the time I'm running around so fast, I couldn't even remember seeing a flower.  That's when a still, small voice said, "If you would slow down enough to listen, you might learn all sorts of things."  Hmmm.  There's a thought.  I see nature coming to life all around me, since it's spring now, and have activities seemingly every minute, but I don't always take the time to savor them, enjoy them and learn from them.  I run around like the proverbial chicken with her head cut off, frantically trying to scratch one more thing off of my list, and then get upset that I don't have some life-altering revelation over a bumblebee.  Go figure.  I certainly have a long way to go, but I have tried to listen a little more and marveled at the incredible rainbow the other day.  It really was beautiful.

The Maze

     Have you ever felt like you were caught in a maze?  You are trying to navigate the best you can through life and make good decisions, but you really don't know what lies around the next corner and if you should go left or right sometimes.  I feel like the mouse in the maze frequently, however my sense of smell is not keen enough to smell the cheese at the exit.  I will stop at the intersection and stare at the choices, agonizing over which is the best one, debating the merits, trying to forsee the future consequences, ultimately becoming frozen, "paralysis by analysis".
     I know what I would tell someone else in this situation.  I would tell them to do the best they could and make a decision.  Even if they hit a dead end, they can enjoy the scenery and learn some lessons along the way.  Perhaps the lessons they learn will help them in the future, maybe it will help others.  It isn't necessarily the "wrong" direction if the path they take has some detours or back tracks.  Life is a journey, not a destination.  Enjoy life to the fullest!
     But will I take my own advice?  Of course not!  Because I want to be perfect.  I don't want to waste time back tracking.  I want a map.  I want some cosmic map that tells me exactly what the best direction is going to be, what the outcome will be, how long it will take, and what it will look like.  That way I can take the quickest, easiest, most pain-free route that will also yield the most effective and abundant results.      
     Unfortunately, I have yet to find that map.  And what's more is ...the more experience I have and the more I learn, the more I realize life wouldn't be as full with one.  Life is still going to be a maze at times with some dead ends, detours, heartaches and bumps.  But it can also be a great adventure with fun, friends, family, lovely memories and breath-taking scenery.  We can pray, listen to our gut, learn from others and then do the best we can with the information we have.  Just keep moving and enjoy the journey.

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!  There is such celebration, excitement and anticipation in those words.  There is something about a new year that holds so much promise.  Gives us the motivation to start something new and the determination that THIS time it will be different.  New year resolutions are positive, encouraging.  No one resolves to get sick, gain weight, destroy a relationship, trash a house or hurt a friend.  We always look forward to getting healthy, starting a good habit, maybe stricking out in a new direction which is scary, but somehow holds more promise at the beginning of the year than it did in September.  The new year is pictured as a baby, cute, new, fresh, full of all sorts of wonderful experiences ahead.  Of course, those of us who have had babies remember they also come with sleep-deprivation, dirty diapers, spit up and crying sometimes.  Which years frequently come with their own issues as well.  By the end of the year, we can definitely relate to the old, bent-over, wrinkled Father time.  Some years are more like the seasoned grandfather-type though.  Lots of experience and not fresh like a newborn baby (sleeping with a clean diaper), but fun, loving and full of fond memories.  I have had both and once again look forward to this new year.  I am hopeful for positive growth in me as a woman, a wife and a mother.  I am hopeful for my children, my family and my friends.  I want so many good things for them. 
I am so grateful, too, that I don't always have to wait for a new year to have a new start.  With the new year, I have thought how God always grants us a fresh start, not only each year, but each month, each week, each day and each moment we come to Him.  I pray, we will remember to come to Him every time we need a new start, whether it be a habit, conversation, attitude, career or relationship.
Blessings for a new beginning.