One of the big words in my life is balance. Not that I feel I have acheived it by any stretch of the imagination. I had a friend over today and spent half the time running the kids to school because of a delay and then a teacher conference. Good thing she still loves me no matter what. That will be a blog for another day.
As I think about balance, I have the image of a tightrope walker. They are usually trying to get from point A to point B on a narrow path. We seldom have the luxury of a wide path in life. There are many things that can distract us and always something to do. But more importantly, the tightrope walker always keeps moving. They don't stand still. They keep putting one foot in front of the other and have something to help them balance, like a pole. They are constantly shifting their weight or the weight of the pole to stay safely on the rope. I have watched tightrope walkers at the circus and they are amazing. If you notice though, they are rarely, if ever, completely still for an extended period of time. How much like life!
At one point I thought balance in my life would be just the right amount of activity and relaxation, with time to accomplish great things and enjoy quality time with my friends and family. It would flow easily with little to no stress and then I could just coast. Then I woke up! More and more I am realizing that balance is a constant shifting of priorities, activities, people, etc. Life doesn't stay still and neither can I. Thank God for the safety net of friends and family when things do get off balance and you are headed for a big splatt on the ground.
So keep moving, keep shifting and enjoy the view!
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Saying No
Saying "no" is not usually easy for me, unless it is my kids asking for money or a telemarketer, and even then I try to be nice about it. But I actually said no to a couple of things this week and an amazing thing happened...nothing, really! The sky didn't fall, no lightning struck me down, my family didn't disown me. I didn't like it, the other people sounded a little sad or disappointed, and I was uncomfortable, but I was also relieved. As much as I didn't like it, I know inside it was the right decision for me now.
There is a tremendous freedom and strength in recognizing what is best for you and then standing up for it. Too many times I have let other people and situations push me into doing what wasn't best for me. I'm not talking about drugs or even something "bad". It can be a very good cause, helping this person, giving to this group, but somewhere deep in your gut it doesn't feel quite right, you are doing it for the wrong reasons and you know it. Even if you won't admit it.
Now before someone goes way off in one direction, there is a balance to things. Sometimes we do need to "go with the flow", "deal with it", etc. etc. We simply cannot control everyone and everything around us. All we can control is our own attitude and behavior. We cannot allow our feelings to rule our lives, they are much too fickle little buggers, but we also can't stuff them and pretend they aren't there. God gave us feelings for a reason and we should listen to what they are saying. We just don't always have to act on them. I love my kids. They really are great kids and there is nothing I wouldn't do for them so they can be happy, healthy adults one day. On some days that is taking them to the coffee shop for some special one on one time, some days it's snuggling on the couch, I love giving gifts and some days it is resisting the urge to strangle them until their eyes pop eye and grounding them until they're 30! (You know the days when they are especially independant and vocal, trying to see which combination of last nerve buttons will get the biggest reaction.)
There is very little danger in my getting too carried away with the "no" thing. I like being busy, for the most party. I enjoy helping people, being involved in different activities and getting out of the house. There is a time to say yes, and I've known there is a time to say no. I'm just finally putting it into practice.
There is a tremendous freedom and strength in recognizing what is best for you and then standing up for it. Too many times I have let other people and situations push me into doing what wasn't best for me. I'm not talking about drugs or even something "bad". It can be a very good cause, helping this person, giving to this group, but somewhere deep in your gut it doesn't feel quite right, you are doing it for the wrong reasons and you know it. Even if you won't admit it.
Now before someone goes way off in one direction, there is a balance to things. Sometimes we do need to "go with the flow", "deal with it", etc. etc. We simply cannot control everyone and everything around us. All we can control is our own attitude and behavior. We cannot allow our feelings to rule our lives, they are much too fickle little buggers, but we also can't stuff them and pretend they aren't there. God gave us feelings for a reason and we should listen to what they are saying. We just don't always have to act on them. I love my kids. They really are great kids and there is nothing I wouldn't do for them so they can be happy, healthy adults one day. On some days that is taking them to the coffee shop for some special one on one time, some days it's snuggling on the couch, I love giving gifts and some days it is resisting the urge to strangle them until their eyes pop eye and grounding them until they're 30! (You know the days when they are especially independant and vocal, trying to see which combination of last nerve buttons will get the biggest reaction.)
There is very little danger in my getting too carried away with the "no" thing. I like being busy, for the most party. I enjoy helping people, being involved in different activities and getting out of the house. There is a time to say yes, and I've known there is a time to say no. I'm just finally putting it into practice.
Monday, September 13, 2010
Stepping out
Despite being a long time dream of mine, which I have shared with a few people, this is a big step out of my comfort zone. There are so many resources out there about motherhood, personal development, time management, child pyschology, organizing, etc., etc., etc., (I have several of them in my home and in my car scattered about) that I have often thought I couldn't possibly offer anything really "new and exciting". However, I also know that sometimes the same information I have heard before, from a different source at a different time can have a profound impact. My hope and prayer is that in sharing some of my thoughts and stories, I can somehow encourage someone else or atleast offer some humor.
I have often said, I wanted to write a book one day and it was going to be called "Help! I'm Super Mom and I'm Tangled up in my Cape!", since that is frequently how I feel. Probably from most people's view, I am one of those moms that usually appears to "have it all together". What they don't see though is that I'm often so tangled up with life that I couldn't fall apart if I wanted to! We modern moms are somehow expected to do it all and definitely look good while doing it. It's difficult to step out of the mold, but I'm trying to be who God created me to be, pursue my passions and enjoy MY journey through this thing called life.
I would love to challenge other women to step out of their comfort zone, discover their unique gifts and pursue their passion. Take a step toward your dream, even if it is a baby step. You never know what may happen, those little buggers are persistent and lightning fast when you aren't looking!!
I have often said, I wanted to write a book one day and it was going to be called "Help! I'm Super Mom and I'm Tangled up in my Cape!", since that is frequently how I feel. Probably from most people's view, I am one of those moms that usually appears to "have it all together". What they don't see though is that I'm often so tangled up with life that I couldn't fall apart if I wanted to! We modern moms are somehow expected to do it all and definitely look good while doing it. It's difficult to step out of the mold, but I'm trying to be who God created me to be, pursue my passions and enjoy MY journey through this thing called life.
I would love to challenge other women to step out of their comfort zone, discover their unique gifts and pursue their passion. Take a step toward your dream, even if it is a baby step. You never know what may happen, those little buggers are persistent and lightning fast when you aren't looking!!
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